Moon Film Reviews: Breathe and Call Me By Your Name

Mr Armie Hammer "that handsome devil." 

Your Cultural Correspondent (Film) noted the irony of the two thirty-something ladies in the row in front of them struggling to breathe, having clambered up some steps to their seats for 'Breathe'. That irony only added to the splendour of what unfolded when the film started. For enjoyers of #ABitofCulture, 'Breathe' was just marvellous.

Ever since they watched several episodes together of 'The Crown' at a friend's house in Labaro, one of the northern suburbs of Rome, Your Cultural Correspondent (Film) has thought that Miss Claire Foy is a very good actress. She reinforced this thought in this film, for even more than the excellent Mr Andrew Garfield, it was really her piece - and the music's. She and Mr Garfield were nobly supported by an array of thesps worthy of un applauso. All that said, if Your Cultural Correspondent (Film) had one 'observation' to make it would be to ask: did the make-up budget in the middle section of the film get syphoned off to pay for the technical machinery? Apart from the son, the main characters went shockingly unaged.

Your Cultural Correspondent (Film) had inadvertently seen that 'Call Me By Your Name'; was awarded five stars by The Guardian. Naturally, this had put them en garde if not filled them with fear about what they were going to see. And dear readers Your Cultural Correspondent (Film) was right to be as they were for 'Call me by your name' was not a very good film. And that is being charitable. Within forty minutes of the start, Your Cultural Correspondent (Film) had yawned twice and from there on in, they did nothing else but yawn. Sadly, not even that handsome devil, Mr Armie Hammer, could save the piece. It was pretentious (with music strategically placed to ensure you knew it was pretentious in case you were in any doubt), the characters, like those in 'Still Alice', were unsympathetic, 'somewhere in Northern Italy' was not given the respect it deserved, and overall apart from some bravura acting by Mr Timothée Chalamet at the very fag end, as it were, of the piece, the film was totally unaffecting. Well, we say totally unaffecting. Quite a number of the audience members appeared affected: two gentlemen left before the end and never before in any film has Your Cultural Correspondent (Film) seen so many gentlemen leave the theatre to 'powder their noses'. Whether this was in response to the advised 'strong sex', or to do what was being taken out of us in the theatre, or to do what the film was, Your Cultural Correspondent (Film) is not sure. Perhaps a documentary could be made about it?

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